Random Reality

An Ode to My 20s

2012-01-10T21:58:00.001-05:00

I like these scrunchy ankle boots
I like Philadelphia
I miss Villanova
Do I like this guy?
Should I date this guy?
When will he call?
Screw it, I will call him.
He wasn't home.
Fuck him, I am going out dancing!
Beer
The Cure
Laugh
I like this guy
I love this guy
He dumped me
I hate myself
I hate my body
TV
Movies
Beer
I will now call all my friends and cry
Depression
More crying
Feeling better
Fuck him, I am going out dancing!
Shoes
U2
Travel
I like myself
I like writing
I love writing
Laugh
Beer
U2
Why the hell are my parents so weird?
I like this guy
But I also like THIS guy
I will date both these guys!
Wait a minute, they both came to see me tonight at my apartment!
At the same time!
I think I will drink this whole bottle
Wine
Pick one guy
That was wrong
Pick the other guy
Move to a new apartment
Then another
Travel
I love him
He loves me
He dumps me
Cry
Call all my friends and cry
Beer
Write
Write more
Travel
Work
Work more
Why won't they fucking edit my story already so I can GO HOME?
Oh my God. It's the copy desk calling at 11 p.m.
The mall
Move to a new city
New job
Move again to another city
Beer
Karaoke
New job
New friends
Lots of friends
Laugh
Is every single one of my friends getting married?
Bridesmaid seven times
Sang "Ave Maria"
Sang it again
And again
I like this guy
Now this guy
Dumped
I hate him
I hate myself
Write a personal ad
Date
A lot
This time, I do the dumping
Beer
More writing
Am I any good at this?
Am I any good as a writer?
As a journalist?
I just wish I knew
Maybe I stink at this
I think I stink at this
No, I am good at this
My boobs look good
My boss hates me
InsomniaAnxietyDepressionTherapy
No more beer
No more guys who make me cry
I like myself more now
I can write
Fuck it, I am gonna sing show tunes!

(My birthday is coming up soon. While I am not all that thrilled to be aging or to be over 40, there are MANY aspects of being older that are great. For one thing, a lot less angst! I know who I am, and what I am capable of, and how strong I am. I know I will survive. Hey, hey.)

Dinner with George Clooney

2011-11-29T13:28:00.001-05:00

I am still holding out hope that one day, I will get to have dinner with George Clooney. Check out my wish on the awesome website Wish Upon A Hero.It was created in 2007 by Rowan University grad, Dave Girgenti. A great website to use for the holidays. Be a hero - grant someone's wish. Maybe even mine;)

(Oh, that is not the REAL George in the photo. It's the wax one.)

Sean Holton's Half-Assed Guide to Journalism Mediocrity

2011-11-29T12:10:00.001-05:00

Sean Holton

My former Orlando Sentinel colleague, Sean Holton, died today after battling brain cancer bravely and with an intact sense of humor. Sipping Jameson's probably helped too. Sean was a great editor, funny guy and very nice man, among many other things. He kept a funny and honest blog while he was sick and you can read it here.

Here is Sean's obituary from his friend Craig. Here is Jeff Kunerth's detailed and awesome obituary in the Orlando Sentinel. (There is also a Guestbook to sign).

In 2003, he created his "Half-Assed Guide to Mediocrity" and passed out copies to his fellow reporters and editors at the Sentinel. Thanks to Lisa Cianci and Mark Schlueb at the Orlando Sentinel for passing this along. It is good advice for my fellow journalists and my journalism students.

Your goal for today is to neither be half-assed nor mediocre. Oh and maybe to sip some Jameson's. Do it in memory of my friend, Sean.

SEAN HOLTON’S HALF-ASSED GUIDE TO MEDIOCRITY

(Version 3.0: Release date, Jan. 6, 2003)

40 ways to promote mediocrity

1. Don’t care.

2. Don’t try.

3. Be negative.

4. Tolerate mediocrity in others.

5. Rationalize mediocrity in yourself and others.

6. Hide out in your job.

7. Build up a small piece of your job into more than it is, and hide behind that.

8. Be blithe about your mistakes.

9. Hide your mistakes.

10. Make people afraid to admit and correct their mistakes.

11. Don’t connect the quality of everything you do to the quality of the overall paper.

12. Don’t connect the quality of your colleagues’ work to your professional self-interest.

13. Don’t respect deadlines.

14. Don’t learn and respect the newsroom process all the way through the copy desk.

15. Don’t make that next phone call.

16. Don’t read that story printout one last time to make sure everything is exactly right.

17. Believe “good enough” is actually good enough.

18. Dwell on the shit that flows downhill, and don’t set the fires that will burn uphill.

19. Kid yourself that mediocrity deserves an “achieves standards” review.

20. Take no responsibility for your decisions, especially the stupid ones.

21. Cultivate your own martyrdom and encourage martyrdom in others.

22. Be a duplicitous backstabber.

23. Relish the blame game.

24. Be afraid to speak your mind.

25. Be afraid to think big.

26. Be afraid to be an aggressive editor.

27. Be afraid to kick back a story when it’s not good enough.

28. Be afraid to be edited aggressively.

29. Throw a snit when a story is kicked back to you.

30. Hoard power.

31. Confuse power with leadership.

32. Manage through fear and control.

33. Kiss up to your bosses and kick down at your subordinates.

34. Treat full-grown adults like children just because they happen to work for you.

35. Forget about all the people around you who are working their asses off.

36. Don’t treat colleagues with professionalism and respect.

37. Don’t get reviews finished on time.

38. Make everything personal.

39. Take everything personally.

40. Bitch about the law of gravity.

I Want a Journalism Internship

2011-10-28T14:58:00.000-04:00

I want a Journalism Internship
by: RandomReality
Here is a funny video I made about my sometimes-silly college journalism students.

The video has been viewed nearly 3,000 times (!!!). It was re-tweeted a bunch of times and the awesome Jim Romenesko did an interview with me for his column.

Kathryn Quigley likes

Xtranormal: I want a Journalism Internship

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My Ash Wednesday Burger Protest

2011-03-10T18:51:00.000-05:00

I ate meat yesterday. I was raised Catholic and knew it was Ash Wednesday but I willingly and defiantly pulled up to the Wendy's drive-thru and ordered a Junior Bacon Cheeseburger. It was delicious and according to the Church, it was a sin.

I knew that and didn't care. Here was my reasoning: If dozens of priests in the Philadelphia Archdiocese can't keep their hands off the private parts of children and teens, and Church leaders protect priests over children, then I am going to eat a damn hamburger.

There I said a curse. Another sin. You know what else is a sin? Priests in a position of power taking sexual advantage of children. It is wrong and it is evil. I know that. The priests know that. Millions of Catholic all over the world know that.

The Archdiocese SHOULD know that. But if they do, why did it take so long for them to respond to these allegations? Why did it take years of abuse claims, investigations and two scathing Grand Jury reports before 21 additional priests were removed from public service this week.

On the TV news last night, I heard a nun say the discipline of the 21 priests "was a persecution of priests." HA! Persecution is what thousands of abused children went through for years, when no one heard their cries and no one stopped the abuse.

I realize my hamburger protest is small and silly. I definitely do NOT think I am going to hell for eating meat. But it is perhaps the first time in my life that I have willingly broken Lenten tradition, even if I haven't been devout in years. But it is my small protest, my personal rebellion against a screwed up Philadelphia patriarchy.

I was raised Catholic in Northeast Philadelphia and attended 16 years of Catholic school. Aside from the folksy "guitar Masses" in the 1970s, I never really experienced a deep sense of love or peace in my parish church or school. Instead, the priests (with the exception of one, who later left the Church) were stern and severe. Confession was intimidating. There were no Saturday night Masses in Philadelphia because it was "wrong." We didn't know why. Masturbation was wrong. Premarital sex was wrong. Heck, mostly everything was wrong.

In religion class, we learned that Hell was painful because we would be on fire for eternity. We were taught that our souls were like white paper dolls and when we sinned, God took a hole punch and left a black mark. Really, teachers? REALLY? Yes.

In my parish grade school, the slow learners were placed in "F" level - "F" for failure. Looking back, I am sure most of those students probably had learning disabilities. But I don't think they were ever helped.

But I kept my faith for two reasons. For one, the two priests in my family - my uncle, Father Jack Quigley of Kansas was a good and kind man. So is my cousin, Father Leon Hutton of California. My high school was St. Basil Academy of Fox Chase, Pa. run by an order of Ukrainian nuns who love their students with all their hearts and each day demonstrate the goodness of Jesus.

I went to Villanova University on as scholarship (not my first choice - I wanted to go to secular Swarthmore). At Villanova, I found a progressive and caring community where Mass was one of the highlights of the week and many students worked for peace and justice. But Villanova is run by Augustinian brother, not the Archdiocese and I bet that made all the difference.

During my years living as a reporter across the country, I found welcoming parishes such as St. Patrick's in Fayetteville, N.C. and St. Juliana's in West Palm Beach, Fl.

Now I live in South Jersey, where I went to a parish church that felt like home. Well, it did until the Bishop of Camden closed my parish. Now I struggle to reconcile my deep doubts about the Catholic Church with how I want to raise my son. I consider becoming an Episcopalian, where women can be priests and priests can marry. Or a Unitarian, since they seem to welcome everyone and judge no one.

How am I supposed to tell my young son that he needs to follow Church law when many of its priests - God's Representatives on Earth - can't keep their hands to themselves? And Church leaders cover it up.

I don't know the answer. But I do know I am eating meat all throughout Lent.

Me and Dan Rather

2008-04-21T15:13:00.000-04:00

Dan Rather came to Rowan University on April 11, 2008 as part of the school's 41st celebration of the Hollybush Summit. That was the event in 1967 where President Lyndon Johnson met face-to-face with Soviet Premier Kosygin. It was a pretty big deal during that time (Cold War) for those two to sit down together.
Rowan - then known as Glassboro State - was selected as a meeting site because it was halfway between NYC and DC. The school had just a few days to get ready and was quickly thrust into the spotlight.
As part of the anniversary of the Summit, former CBS anchor Dan Rather was brought in to moderate a panel on nuclear proliferation. He also took the time to teach a class for our students, including some of "my kids." It was great. He was great. All Dan Rather haters can just shut up.
I heard him speak at the IRE convention in Denver in 2005 and he was great then, too. I found him to be smart, well-spoken and really quite humble. He gave my kids good advice. Here are some of my notes:

The ability to write is the most important skill for a journalist

"You have to read books."

A journalist is an honest broker of information for the people at home.

"If I'd been a better speller I might have stayed in newspapers."

Be accurate. Be fair.

News is what someone somehere doesn't want you to know. All the rest is advertising.

"Look it up in the dictionary."

Journalists don't need to know everything, they just need who to ask or where to look it up.

(He is speaking entirely without notes.)

In terms of ethics, listen to the inner voice that says "you are going too far."

After the panel, I weasled my way into a reception and got to chat up Dan one-on-one. In the pictures, I alternately look like I am pushing him or about to hug him. Hee.

My column about sex with: high-priced hookers, the McGreeveys and horsies

2008-03-20T15:19:00.000-04:00

Clearly, I lead a dull life. This may be because I am the single mother of a high-energy toddler who runs around all day and wakes up all night. Or it could be because I never had sex with: a high-priced prostitute, an aide to former N.J. Gov. Jim McGreevey, or a horse.

Let’s talk about the call girl first. “Kristen” from the Emperor’s Club VIP used her Jersey Girl smarts to charge $4,300 for sex with former Gov. Eliot Spitzer of New York. Now he is no longer governor. And millions of people are listening to her songs on her MySpace page. I admire “Kristen” for thinking she is worth that much. But Eliot, really, $4,300?? I balk at paying $19.99 for Match.com.

What the heck did $4,300 buy exactly? It sure wasn’t discretion. Let me tell you what I would expect for $4,300: George Clooney, in the dark suit he wore in “Ocean’s 11,” feeding me chocolate-covered strawberries. He would laugh at my jokes, rub my feet and come around to my point of view that Hillary Clinton would make a better president than Barack Obama. Of course we would make sweet, sweet love but it actually would cost NOTHING because George would be so enamored of me. See? This is a good fantasy and it cost nothing.

Apparently it cost nothing (except for perhaps his pride and self-worth) for a former aide to Jim McGreevey to announce this week that he had threesomes with McGreevey and his ex-wife. Dina Matos McGreevey says “no way,” Jim McGreevey and the aide say “way” and I am left befuddled. I think I am going to go with Dina on this one, if only because Jim has already proved himself to be a liar, liar, pants on fire.

I know people have threesomes – I watch cable TV, but it all seems like a lot of effort.

Take the “swingers lifestyle” for example. One drawback of being a tired single parent is that I often just flip to whatever is on TV and am too dopey to change the channel. So there I was, watching Showtime or HBO or some other premium channel that I have since canceled because "The Wire" over (sob!) and there was a documentary all about swingers. Let me try to express my opinion of some of the people featured: They are not attractive.

No. Nope. Not. At. All.

See, if I had the time, energy and inclination to “swing,” I would want to do it with supermodels and hunky actors. These people in the documentary looked like the dude at the car wash and his woman.

There were also all these rules. For instance, one couple only dated other couples. What? Dating once you are married? I thought that was the POINT of being married – to never, EVER have to date again. And not only does the couple need to get along, each couple has to get along with EACH OTHER – enough to have sex. Now really, when does that ever happen? The couple’s other rule was that they had to begin the evening having sex with each other, then they switched to the other couple and then they came back again to each other again at the end of the night. Whew!

At least they were not having sex with a horse. Another show that caught my tired attention recently was a movie on the Sundance channel called "Zoo." It about farm animals and the men who … love them. Except one of the men, who was from Seattle, died in 2005 after having sex with a horse. Yes.

The movie "Zoo" is all arty and blue-toned and not at all graphic. The men talk about their love of horses and there are shots of men in silhouette walking to the barn as music plays. I was horrified anyway – but kept watching in that car-wreck way.

I am not alone. When the story was first published in the Seattle Times, it became the most clicked-on story on the Web site – for the whole year. According to Editor & Publisher, this was partly because the story was a link on the Drudge Report website.

All of this proves that I live a very dull life, indeed. Thank God.

When an Airplane Doesn't Fly

2008-01-24T12:27:00.000-05:00

Ten years ago, I wrote a memorable newspaper article about a prostituion sting along a highway in Central Florida. The highway hookers carried flashlights and lured men who were driving by, looking for some, um, companionship. An undercover sting nabbed ten men, one of whom was in his 70s and walked with a cane.

My kicker to the story was about how one "customer" asked the undercover hooker for a sex act called an "airplane." No one knew what that meant, but we all had a good laugh. Today in class, I had my students read the story as an example of a short, but amusing tale written on deadline. They figured out what an "airplane" was in about 5 seconds by Googling it. (No Google in 1998). Here it is. (See Definitions 3, 4 or 5)

Let me just say that this act seems quite complicated and involves at least three people. Oh my! Thank God my students are over 18. I had NO idea what it meant!

Where In The World Has RandomReality Been?

2008-01-24T12:18:00.000-05:00

Hi faithful readers,

As you can see, there was a lengthy gap in between posts. One reason: ear infections. Actually, four of them. In a row. My Little Dude has been quite miserable. Poor little guy. So he is not sleeping, I am not sleeping and therefore, not posting. He is on yet another antibiotic and we are going to see the ENT. I predict ear tubes in his future. Aiiie.

Tom Cruise and Jerry O'Connell

2008-01-23T20:27:00.000-05:00

Have you guys seen this video of Tom Cruise waxing poetic about Scientology? It is most amusing. And creepy. And weird. All at the same time. Two things I enjoy most: the peppy music in the background and his maniacal laugh. Two questions: Why is he LAUGHING so much? What the hell is he TALKING about? I have no idea. Enjoy.

Even better than Tom's video is Jerry O'Connell's parody on FunnyOrDie.com. For one thing, it's shorter. For another, he's got the laugh and nonsensical speech pattern down pat. I could watch this all day.

George Clooney Yells at Paparazzi

2007-11-20T16:10:00.000-05:00

Now who can blame him. George and his girlfriend, Sarah (yes, I am strong enough to say the word 'girlfriend' and not in relation to me) were on his motorcycle when they were almost cut off by a paparazzi. So George got off the motorcycle and yelled at them. Good for him.
Really. I want to see pictures of George as much as the next person but the paparazzi are just too crazy. Driving recklessly is an idiotic way to get a photo, even if it does make the photog some money.

Sometimes I Miss Being a Police Reporter

2007-11-20T16:00:00.000-05:00

Sigh. It is stories like this one that make me miss being a cops reporter sometimes. A drunk, naked man caused three accidents on I-95 in Delaware today as he ran in and out of traffic. He caused the accidents when the cars swerved to avoid him.

See? This story raises so many questions. Why was he drunk? How much did he drink? Where were his clothes? How did he get naked? Did someone throw him out of the car naked? Or was he driving naked? And drunk?

Many, many questions. I hope someone took pictures.

George Clooney and Fabio

2007-11-08T13:41:00.000-05:00

Apparently George Clooney and Fabio the model (and Butter guy) got into some kind of smack-down this weekend in a California restaurant. I am still gathering details on this. More later.

---

Okay here is the scoop and a photo. All I can say is, who among us has not occasionally gotten the urge to smack Fabio?

Bono was Awesome

2007-10-24T16:01:00.000-04:00

I know, I know. It has been weeks since I went to see my Secondary Boyfriend, Bono, accept the Liberty Medal at the National Constitution Center. It was awesome. You can believe me on that or you can watch for youself with a rebroadcast of the event.
Bono is a great fan of America and of early democracy and of Benjamin Franklin, "who wore John Lennon glasses before they were cool." Even though Bono is Irish, he thinks of America as "his country," too.
He praised Thomas Jefferson for the opening lines of the Declaration of Independence about life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
"They're great lyrics, Mr. Jefferson," Bono joked. "Great opening riff."
But in a country as great as America, Bono wondered why we allowed so much of the rest of the world to go hungry, to suffer from AIDS. We must do something, he said. And he is right. We must.
www.one.org

Bono!!!!!!

2007-09-27T14:52:00.000-04:00

I get to see Bono of U2 tonight!!!!!! He is being awarded the Liberty Medal at the National Constitution Center in Philadelphia and I got tickets!! Doing so involved my becoming a member of the Constitution Center, so now I have my own pocket-sized copy of the Constitution in my purse. Hey, one never knows when one might need such a copy.
RandomReality fans may recall that I heard Bono speak to the World Affairs Council at a lecture at U of Penn in 2005. Later, I actually got to talk to him (okay, one sentence: "I love you, but not in a creepy way") at a reception afterwards. His talks about Africa, global AIDS relief and poverty are so inspiring. Everytime I hear him speak, I want to move to Africa and start a school. Oh wait. I have no money. And Oprah already did that. But still, Bono is putting his money (and stardom) where his mouth is and using it for a CAUSE.
What is even better, his efforts get results.

George Bravely Attends a Movie Premiere

2007-09-25T10:59:00.000-04:00

My George! So brave! Despite his injuries, he attended a premiere of his new movie, "Michael Clayton." On his arm was his "friend," Sarah, who had a cast on one foot and high heels on the other (!?!).

Watch the interview and may I just point out, that I would have done a MUCH better job interviewing him. WHAT is with the silly question she asks about: "What is the last issue YOU had to fix?" Lord.

George Clooney in Motorcycle Accident in New Jersey!!

2007-09-24T15:26:00.000-04:00

George, my poor George! My cheri amour!!! He was injured this past weekend in a motorcycle accident in northern New Jersey! He broke ribs and his "friend" (this is how all the news accounts refer to her) Sarah Larson broke her foot! It all happened in Weehawken (as so much does!)

Aiiee! My George is suffering! He is in pain! This upsets me so much that I am over-using exclamation marks!!

Should I go to him? In L.A.? Quit my job and stand vigil outside his house?

Nah. I love him but I am not CRAZY.

But I shall think good thoughts for him (oh and his "friend" too) and shall slap every motorcycle I see. Bad motorcycle, for hurting my George!

Famous French Mime is Dead

2007-09-24T15:21:00.000-04:00

Marcel Marceau is dead. In his memory, I shall say nothing.

(Get it? Because he is a mime, see? So I am saying nothing. See? Oh never mind.)

Chocolate Rain

2007-08-17T21:24:00.000-04:00

This song, a hit on YouTube, has been in my head all day. I know not why.

This song is, I believe, about rain that is chocolate. I know not why.

Oh and here is a version as sung by Darth Vader.

And McGruff the crime dog!

My friend and a kangaroo

2007-08-01T16:06:00.000-04:00

My friend Tiggy went to Australia for a conference. Here is a funny picture of her with her new friends, the kangaroos. Personally, kangaroos freak me out a little. I am afraid they will kick me with their feet. It is a good thing I don't live near any.

Rick Springfield and me in a riot

2007-07-09T22:16:00.000-04:00

     Call me Jessie's Girl. My love for 1980s pop star Rick Springfield goes back to my grade school days growing up in the Tacony section of Northeast Philadelphia. In the early 1980s, Springfield appeared as Dr. Noah Drake on the wildly popular soap opera "General Hospital." I was hooked. To heck with Luke and Laura. My 14-year-old brain knew a hunk when I saw him.

     I also knew a riot when I saw one. Or as much of a riot as pre-teenage girls can cause. I got caught in one at the Roosevelt Mall on June 30, 1981 when Springfield was supposed to sign autographs and meet fans at the Sam Goody store as part of a promotion with WIFI-FM radio. Twenty-six years later, the memory is still vivid.

     Rick Springfield appearing at "our mall" was a huge deal for my friends Karen, Anne and Patty. We just graduated from St. Timothy's grade school and were spending our summer watching "General Hospital" and hanging out at the Roosevelt Mall. We browsed at John Wanamaker's department store, poked around Marlo Books and bought clothes at Famous Maid. The mall was our second home.

     The thought of Springfield - hunky Dr. Drake - in OUR MALL was almost too much for us to bear. Springfield was supposed to show up at the Sam Goody at 11 a.m. to promote his hit single, "Jessie's Girl." Anne and I met on Magee Avenue and walked to Brous Avenue to meet Patty and Karen. Onward to the mall.

     A massive crowd awaited us. Hundreds, no THOUSANDS of pre-teen girls like us, plus teenagers too. We wove our way over to the Sam Goody store and got in the line.

     Where was Rick Springfield? We started getting antsy, hot and tired. It was time for a Coke and a pretzel. But first, we would meet our beloved Rick. I believed I WOULD get to meet him. After all, I had met the guy who played Bo Duke from the "Dukes of Hazzard" at the car show a couple months before and had the photos to prove it.

     Suddenly, the crowd starting swaying and moving towards the record store. CRASH!! The entire plate glass window in the front of the store shattered into a million pieces. We screamed.

     I don't remember if we ran from the store or just figured, "Heck, now we are closer to Rick Springfield!" But they didn't let us in the record store. Picture a crowd of teenage girls denied their idol. We were not happy. I don't remember anyone throwing anything or hitting each other, but there was pushing, whining and yelling.

     The next thing I remember is standing in the parking lot and watching a police car speed by. Inside was Springfield, his hands covering his head, which was down in his lap. They had to take him out in a police car because the cops were afraid we would maul him. And we might have, if I had known what "maul" meant when I was 12. We ran after the car for a bit, but no luck. It kept going.

     All these years later, my love for Springfield continues. In 2001, I saw him perform at the MGM Grand Hotel in Las Vegas. For one brief moment, our eyes locked as he walked by me, carrying his guitar. I wanted to yell, "Rick! I helped shove in a plate glass window for you!" But I thought his memories of that incident may not be as fond as mine.

     Not long ago, I got to see him perform at the Keswick Theater in Glenside. He is in his 50s now but still has that penetrating stare and cute butt. He is still a hunk.

     Best of all, he is now back on "General Hosptial." I started watching the show again in 2005, when the character of Dr. Noah Drake returned as a way to introduce his equally-hunky son, Dr. Patrick Drake. This month, Springield is playing TWO characters on the show - Dr. Drake and rocker Eli Love. How is this possible? Who cares. It is a soap opera.

     And 26 years later, I am still a fan and would still chase Springfield through a mall parking lot. But I would probably have to stop and rest along the way.

When The Stars Go Blue

2007-04-18T13:58:00.000-04:00

(This blog will not address the shootings at Virginia Tech because frankly, the whole thing just makes me too sad. Let's have better gun control. That would make me happy)

On to the inane and amusing. (Because if we don't laugh, we cry.)

Last night on "American Idol," Blake sang a song called "When the Stars Go Blue," which was attributed to Tim McGraw. I sat there thinking, "I KNOW I've heard that song before."

And I have. It was a song by the Irish group the Corrs and Bono did backup. Here is the link to Bono and the Corrs performing "When the Stars Go Blue" at Live 8 in 2005. (The song was originally written by Ryan Adams and is on the 2001 CD called Gold. Thanks to Kathy B. for that info.)

I much prefer the Bono/Corrs version to Blake's, although he was pretty good last night. I voted for him and Melinda, who is my favorite. I just think she is awesome. Here is my take on the other contestants:

1. Sanjaya. Okay, I am so amused by him. He is handling his 15 minutes of fame with grace and a smile and I say he should ride that horse till it drops. I liked his bandanna.

2. Jordin. My mom likes her and so does my friend Antigone. But eh, I don't want her to be my "next American Idol" as Simon says. Eh.

3. Laskisha. She took too much of a chance singing a Carrie Underwood song. That brought comparisons, which are not good, because LaKisha and Carrie could not be MORE different. I think Lakisha is quite talented but I don't know if she will win.

4. Phil. Eh, he bores me. And he looks better with a hat.

5. Chris. I fast-forward through his performances. But what was up with the pandering to Virginia Tech? Oy. Of course, it wasn't as bad as Ryan Seacrest starting the show with condolences to V.T. and then launching right into - with no segue - "THIS. Is American Idol." THAT. Was tacky.

Who am I forgetting? Blake, Sanjaya, Jordin, Lakisha, Chris, Melinda. Were there only six? Hmm. If someone else sang last night, it flew right out of my brain.

George Clooney Nice to Children

2007-04-05T16:39:00.000-04:00

See? And you wonder why I love George Clooney so much. He is nice to children who sell lemonade.

Chad Vader

2007-03-28T16:34:00.000-04:00

In which Chad Vader, the loser brother of Darth Vader from "Star Wars," works as a manager at a grocery store and must deal with employees who do not appreciate his powers.

I Miss the Days When Beverages Weren't Dangerous

2007-03-12T16:29:00.000-04:00

Remember how cold, nasty and icky it was the other week? The Kid and I decided to leave Philadelphia and hop a plane to Orlando to visit family. But since the kid is actually a baby, this was not easy.

Flying with a baby involves planning, strategy and much forethought about beverages.Not only do parents at the airport have to take off their shoes (to check for bombs) and put both their strollers and carseats through the X-ray machine (to check for bombs) but now baby formula, water and baby wash over four ounces must be checked (for bombs).

I packed the diaper bag, which is usually stocked with formula, juice and Pedialyte. But oh no. All of these things are badddddd. Well, four ounces of them are okay, but any more than that and they become bomb-ful. So instead I packed powdered formula and planned to buy water at the airport.

Things went fairly smoothly at the Philadelphia International Airport, probably because we are flying Southwest and they are family-friendly and let you pick out your own seat. The Kid and I made a dash for the bulkhead seat so we have room to play. Well, he played and I kept him from crawling to the cockpit.

Even though beverages are bad, wrong, awful and a threat to our nation, the cheerful flight attendant provides me with soda for me and water to mix the formula for the Kid.

The trip on the way back is a whole other story. This is perhaps because we flew an airline that might sound like Hair Can. I’ve flown Hair Can many times before, but it is different now that I have the Kid. Little things mean a lot.

There was bad weather in the Northeast on the day we were scheduled to fly back. I called the 800 number for Hair Can and learned that the plane was late. So I decided to get to the airport a little later because there is nothing worse than spending a long time waiting for a plane with a bored and fussy baby.

The decision to wait was a mistake. When I got to curbside check in, the baggage guy would not check my bag.

“You are late for your flight,” he said.

“No, I’m not,” I replied. “The flight is an hour late.”

“But my computer says you are late,” he said.

“I am not late, even for the ORIGINAL departure time,” I replied.

It didn’t matter. His computer was giving him orders. The computer must be obeyed. The only way for me to check my suitcase would be if I took it to the gate. This meant that I had to push the Kid’s stroller with one hand and pull the suitcase with the other, while carrying a diaper bag and purse. I kept knocking into walls.

We got to X-ray in the Orlando Airport. They were nice and let me and the Kid go to a shorter line. Here is where it got complicated. I had to: take off my shoes and put them on the belt, put my diaper bag and purse on the belt, heave and shove the suitcase onto the belt, take the Kid’s carseat out of the stroller and put the stroller though the belt. Then I had to unbuckle the Kid and take him out of the seat and shove it through the X-ray; then walk through the machine, all the while holding the Kid and our boarding passes.

I was exhausted. A chatty woman from Texas watched me shove and hurl things onto the belt.

"Gosh, that’s a lot of stuff,” she observed.

On the other end of the X-ray, I had to do everything in reverse, while a line backed up. I was one of those people holding up the line. I hate when I am one of those people. Here came Texas Lady.

“Wow, you got it all back together,” she commented. “That’s amazing.”

Um, yes and it would have been easier if you had HELPED me instead of WATCHING me.

We got the gate to check the bag. I still need to use the restroom, change the baby’s diaper and buy water for formula. Oh no. The plane is leaving on time. No it isn’t. Yes, it is. I wait in line. The sign at the gate says the plane is leaving late. The gate attendant says it isn’t.

“Oh that,” she gestured to the sign. “We have no control over that.”

See? Once again, Hair Can is being controlled by its computers. We got on board, with no liquids. Perhaps this was good, because I really had to go to the bathroom. The pilot told us the plane was leaving. No it wasn’t. Yes, it was.

To make a long story short, the plane finally left, I eventually got some water and went to the restroom. And I changed the Kid’s diaper while he sat in his carseat. It didn’t contain a bomb. Of any kind.

I am a Pastafarian

2006-12-30T18:21:00.000-05:00

Hello fans and friends. I am back. I am not sure how often I shall correspond with you all, since my new little room-mate can be quite demanding and occasionally, ill tempered. As well as leaky.

But the main change in my life is that I am now a Pastafarian. May the Great Flying Spaghetti touch you with his Noodly Appendage!!

As a Pastafarian, I now believe quite strongly in pirates and midgets. I also follow the 8 sacred laws, known as the "I'd Rather You Didn'ts." They were discovered by the prophet Bobby Henderson. Here they are:

The Eight "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts"

I'd Really Rather You Didn't Act Like a Sanctimonious Holier-Than-Thou Ass When Describing My Noodly Goodness. If Some People Don't Believe In Me, That's Okay. Really, I'm Not That Vain. Besides, This Isn't About Them So Don't Change The Subject.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Use My Existence As A Means To Oppress, Subjugate, Punish, Eviscerate, And/Or, You Know, Be Mean To Others. I Don't Require Sacrifices, And Purity Is For Drinking Water, Not People.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Judge People For The Way They Look, Or How They Dress, Or The Way They Talk, Or, Well, Just Play Nice, Okay? Oh, And Get This In Your Thick Heads: Woman = Person. Man = Person. Samey - Samey. One Is Not Better Than The Other, Unless We're Talking About Fashion And I'm Sorry, But I Gave That To Women And Some Guys Who Know The Difference Between Teal and Fuchsia.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Indulge In Conduct That Offends Yourself, Or Your Willing, Consenting Partner Of Legal Age AND Mental Maturity. As For Anyone Who Might Object, I Think The Expression Is Go F*** Yourself, Unless They Find That Offensive In Which Case They Can Turn Off the TV For Once And Go For A Walk For A Change.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Challenge The Bigoted, Misogynist, Hateful Ideas Of Others On An Empty Stomach. Eat, Then Go After The B*******.
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Build Multimillion-Dollar Churches/Temples/Mosques/Shrines To My Noodly Goodness When The Money Could Be Better Spent (Take Your Pick):

Ending Poverty
Curing Diseases
Living In Peace, Loving With Passion, And Lowering The Cost Of Cable
I Might be a Complex-Carbohydrate Omniscient Being, But I Enjoy The Simple Things In Life. I Ought To Know. I AM the Creator.

I'd Really Rather You Didn't Go Around Telling People I Talk To You. You're Not That Interesting. Get Over Yourself. And I Told You To Love Your Fellow Man, Can't You Take A Hint?
I'd Really Rather You Didn't Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You If You Are Into, Um, Stuff That Uses A Lot of Leather/Lubricant/Las Vegas. If the Other Person Is Into It, However (Pursuant To #4), Then Have At It, Take Pictures, And For The Love Of Mike, Wear a CONDOM! Honestly, It's A Piece of Rubber. If I Didn't Want It To Feel Good When You Did It I Would Have Added Spikes, Or Something.

There is a guy in my life

2006-06-07T19:25:00.000-04:00

RandomReality will be on temporary hiatus. I met a guy. He is short and bald but I think he is perfect, although he can be a little whiny, especially when he wants to eat. Boy, does he have an appetite! He and I will be together at least through early July and then, who knows. Wish us luck in our relationship:)

Bono on NBC Nightly News to Discuss Africa

2006-05-22T12:22:00.000-04:00

Bono will be on the NBC Nightly News with Brian Williams on Tuesday, May 23 to discuss his recent trip to Africa. Tune in. Or click on this link to the One Campaign to find out more about the organization's mission to end extreme poverty and global AIDS.

This is from the website:

How come Britney Spears doesn't have to take Parenting Classes?

2006-05-19T17:45:00.000-04:00

Cause she clearly needs some! Check out this story of her almost dropping her baby son on his noggin because she was holding a drink in one hand and almost tripped on her too-high shoes. At least she did not spill her drink. Whew!

To get licensed as a foster mother, I had to get fingerprinted, answer questions about masturbation, buy a fire extinguisher that weighed over 5 pounds and sit through hours of parenting classes and videos. Britney just had to have sex. Granted, it was with KFed, so that is its own particular chore, but still.

That girl either needs to hire a nanny, stop carrying her child, or stop carrying her child while she also carries a drink and wears silly shoes.

Oh and the New York Times reports that one of the most popular girls' names is Nevaeh. It's Heaven spelled backwards. Yup yup.

Happy Birthday

2006-05-06T22:01:00.000-04:00

George Clooney!!!!!!!!!!

xxxxxxxxxx0000000000xxxxxxxxxxx

Guess what I learned this weekend?

2006-04-30T23:41:00.000-04:00

So I wanted to make brownies. The recipe called for two eggs but I only had one. So I made the brownies with just one egg. Guess what I learned? That makes the brownies really, really hard and crunchy. But they are still tasty! Kind of like biscotti. But square, instead of long and rectangular. They are good when I dunk them in tea. I will make you some hard, crunchy-biscotti-like brownies if you ask me nicely and I only have one egg.

At least I don't get spanked at my job

2006-04-27T19:16:00.000-04:00

If you ever think your job is bad, read this article. It could be worse. You could get spanked at work as part of "camaraderie-building" exercises.

I Would Worship at the Church of U2

2006-04-15T01:00:00.000-04:00

Many chruches are now incorporating U2's music into their services. How come MY church doesn't have a U2 Eucharist????

George Clooney stalks Gawker

2006-04-01T13:54:00.000-05:00

See? This is yet another reason why I love and admire George Clooney. The Gawker website recently created a real-time map of celebrity sightings in NYC. You would think I would be on the website constantly, searching for my love, GC, and where he might be in real time. But I am not. I have a life and so does GC. If we run into each other, it shall be due to Kismet, not a celebrity stalking website.

George, because he is clever, urged many publicists to flood the Gawker website with bogus sightings of himself and other celebrities. I think this is a good idea. Let me tell you something, I don't really WANT to see GC coming out of the men's room or disgusting from a workout at the gym. I want to see him all clean and in a tux like at the Oscars.

Great True Crime story

2006-03-19T17:14:00.000-05:00

Click here to read a great true crime story by my friend Missy Stoddard at the Sun-Sentinel newspaper in Florida. She covers courts there and wrote about the case of a teenager who stabbed her older boyfriend to death. The story involves murder, motels, teen pregnancy and a BBQ fork used as a weapon.

Look What Happened In Paris the Day I Left

2006-03-17T11:44:00.000-05:00

Rioting in the streets! Right near the hotel where I stayed! Oh my. We left our hotel in Boulevard St. Michel on Thursday morning to get the Eurostar back to London. On Thursday night, thousands of French students took to the streets to protest a new proposed labor law. Tear gas, demonstrators arrested. All that. Oh my.

Hello from London!

2006-03-10T19:41:00.000-05:00

I am writing this in the business center of the hotel. Hopefully I will get done before my money runs out on this terminal. Eight minutes left! Must. Type. Faster!
British Airways is my new favorite airline. We had little TV screens on the seat backs in front of us and "Good Night and Good Luck" was playing! And "Pride and Prejudice." But I fell asleep during that one. The woman in front of me lowered her seat practically in my lap during the flight. I hate that.
It is chilly and rainy here in London but no different that this time of year in Philly. Our hotel is very nice - there is a "pillow menu" so I can select different kinds of firmness and feathers.
Am trying to save money so ate dinner at the KFC. Two completely different foreign tourists asked me questions about my meal (two piece with fries and corn on the cob). A man from Africa wanted to know exactly what comprised my meal. A student from Spain needed to know how to order corn on the cob. He ordered popcorn by mistake and they gave him popcorn chicken. I must have a look about me that says, "this woman knows her chicken. Ask her questions." Or they were trying to steal my purse. Whichever.

Cheerio! Pip Pip!

2006-03-09T14:34:00.000-05:00

RandomReality is off to Europe to drink tea and meet men with accents. Discuss amongst yourselves: Is a guy with a French accent sexier than a guy with a British accent. Ta ta.

Farewell Coca Cola C2!

2006-03-08T00:01:00.000-05:00

As many of you know, we here at RandomReality are somewhat obsessed with C2 Cola. It was marketed as "half the calories of regular Coke" and we at RandomReality found it to be yummy. The doctor told RandomReality to cut back on sugar so a switch was made from regular Coke (nectar from the gods) to Diet Coke. But this was bad. Not appealing. Not fulfilling.

Then Coca Cola C2 came along and bewitched RandomReality with its flavor - kinda diet but with enough of a hint of sugar to make it worthwhile. For a time, C2 was in steady supply. RandomReality and her friend Lisa L. drank C2 with enjoyment.

Then it got harder to find, and therefore, more precious. Much like diamonds. (Come to think of it, RandomReality doesn't have any of those either. Someone donate a diamond to me.)

As with all things in love and obsession, the harder it was to find C2, the more I craved it. I still had my suppliers - namely the Wawas in Philadelphia and occasionally the ShopRite in South Jersey.

But all is for naught. All hope is lost. C2 is nowhere to be found. The Coke people want me to drink Coke Zero or Diet Coke with lime. BLEH. No.

There are two cans of C2 cola remaining in RandomReality's fridge, sitting there for a rainy day, special occasion or the next time we get thirsty. It will be a sad, sad day when the C2 is finally gone. But I don't think I shall save those cans, for unlike wine, I don't think C2 gets better with age.

Overheard outside my office

2006-03-07T15:01:00.000-05:00

"Who died? My hamster? How did my hamster die?"

RandomReality on the 2006 Academy Awards

2006-03-05T23:44:00.000-05:00

(In which we learn that it is hard out there for a pimp, but not for George Clooney.)

Oh the joy and anticipation of seeing my Fantasy Boyfriend, George Clooney, at the Oscars. I am very, very proud of him as well as happy that his movie, "Good Night and Good Luck" is so good and has received so much praise. My 78-year-old father has finally stopped talking about Ben Affleck as a possible suitor for me (good thing since Ben is now married) and realizes my deep love for George Clooney. But Dad heard George say on the Barbara Walters interview that he never wants to get married again. This troubles Dad. It does not trouble me. I do not wish to MARRY George. Wink, wink.

PRE-SHOW:

Felicity Huffman is being interviewed. She is being shown video of her "Desperate Housewives" cast mates wishing her luck, and calling her Flicka (?!?) This makes her cry. "Oh my God! My makeup," she weeps.

Phillip Seymour Hoffman is interviewed. He never read any of Truman Capote's works till after he got the part in "Capote." Blasphemy.

Billy Bush. Is. Such. A. Tool. He should shut up, shut up, shut up. Billy Bush is asking the very serious and cerebral actor David Straithairn whether he considers himself a "star." Straithairn takes a minute to answer. "No," he said. "No." And for emphasis, "No."

I am officially tired of hearing "Brokeback Mountain" referred to as a "cultural phenomenon." I get it, I get it.

7:57 p.m.

KEEP BILLY BUSH AWAY FROM THE CELEBRITIES INSIDE THE THEATER!!!

8 p.m.

Diet Coke is sponsoring the Oscars this year. I wish it were C2 cola. I love C2 and can no longer find it anywhere!!!!! Mourn with me. Oh, the show is starting.

A funny sketch about all the previous hosts and why they aren't hosting the show this year. Billy Crystal is sharing a "special" moment with Chris Rock in a tent. Hee! Jon Stewart is dreaming and is in bed with Halle Berry. NOW HE IS IN BED WITH GEORGE CLOONEY!!!! AIIIIEEEEEE! Hyperventilating. Jealous. Projecting. Hee.

Jon starts the show. I love him (but in a different way than George).

"Ladies, gentlemen, Felicity," Stewart cracks, in a joke about Huffman in "Transamerica." Stewart urges us all to celebrate excellence in film "with me, the fourth male lead in 'Death to Smoochy'."

The camera flashes to Charlize Theron who is NOT smiling, perhaps because of the enormous black bow butterfly-thing sticking up on her left shoulder.

Stewart makes a shout-out to George Clooney, quipping that "Good Night and Good Luck" is how George ends all his dates. Hee. Then a Dick Cheney and Bjork joke.

8:16 p.m.

Best Supporting Actor goes to..... GEORGE CLOONEY!!!! Pandemonium! Shrieking! Hysteria! All in my own head and apartment!!!!!!!! Nicole Kidman presents him with the award. She is very blonde and looks good. Remember they starred together in "The Peacemaker." George quips that he guesses he is "not going to win Best Director." Oh George! There is music playing while he speaks. Shut up, music! George talks about movies of importance and how Hollywood has shines a light on subjects like AIDS and Civil Rights. He is very smart. Good speech. He is elegant and well-behaved and looks marvy in his tux.

Stewart is back on. That Oscar, he said, "is the kind of thing that can get a fellow laid."

Ben Stiller is now in a green unitard to present the Special Effects award. He does NOT look good in the unitard but it is funny.

Why is Jennifer Lopez at the Oscars? Did I miss something? I liked "Out of Sight" (also with George Clooney) but that was a lot of years ago.

Naomi Watts admires Dolly Parton and introduces her.

8:48 p.m.

Jennifer Aniston presents the award for Best Costume Design. She looks GREAT and is wearing a fabulous black chiffon gown. Take THAT, Brad.

I am now officially bored and am flipping between the Oscars and "Napoleon Dynamite."

9:04 p.m.

The lovely and pregnant Rachel Weisz wins Best Supporting Actress. Morgan Freeman, a.k.a. the voice of God, presents her with the award. More music while she gives her acceptance speech. Annoying music!

9:18 p.m.

A video spoof on campaign ads for the Best Actress category, like they are local politicians. Very funny.

9:26 p.m.

Flames, smoke, dancing, singing. People moving in slow motion. A man carries a child. Oh, it is the song from "Crash." How I long for the days of Rob Lowe and Snow White performing "Proud Mary."

9:40 p.m.

Crowd shot. Oh no. Jack Nicholson is sitting next to Keira Knightley! No! He will sully her! Stay away!

9:45 p.m.

Violin virtuoso Itzhak Perlman (sp?) performs selections from the nominated music for Best Original Score.

9:57 p.m.

More filler! Another montage, this time of "epic" movies. What the heck are "Mary Poppins" and "Grease" doing in there?

10:18 p.m.

Rappers perform "It's Hard Out There For A Pimp" from the movie "Hustle and Flow." Hee! Rap at the Oscars! I am enjoying this. Now the song is in my head. Queen Latifah gives out the award for Best Original Song. It goes to "It's Hard Out There for a Pimp!!" The rappers are really excited. It is sweet.

"You know what? I think it just got a little easier out there for a pimp," Stewart quips.

Jennifer Garner, with her post-pregnancy breasts, presents an award for Best Sound Editing. She is fiddling with her dress.

10:30 p.m.

SHRIEK!!! George Clooney is on again! He is introducing the montage (bleh) of clips about people who died this year. He is good, but he deserves to present some OTHER award. He is the future, not the past.

10:44 p.m.

Hilary Swank presents the Best Actor award. She looks stunning in a strapless black dress. (I once interviewed her husband, Chad Lowe. Just an aside.) The flash on the nominees. Why does Heath Ledger have a cheesy moustache these days?? Again, why is Jennifer Lopez at the Oscars???

Philip Seymour Hoffman wins. No surprise. He was good.

"I'm overwhelmed. I'm really overwhelmed," he said. Then he thanks his friends, his friends, his friends - whom he loves, he loves, he loves.

10:55 p.m.

John Travolta presents Best Cinematographer. Sigh. Get to the good awards already! (I'm sure the guy who won Best Cinematographer thought the award was good, but we, the viewing public, did not.)

10:57 p.m.

Jamie Foxx presents the Best Actress award. Charlize Theron does NOT look happy. She should just rip off that bow, already.

Reese Witherspoon wins. Her dress is silver with beading. She is "just trying to matter."

11:03 p.m.

See? This show could have been LOTS shorter if they had just cut out the stupid montages.

11:08 p.m.

Dustin Hoffman, in an elegant tux, presents one of the Best Screenplay awards. It goes to Diana Ossana and Larry McMurtry (who is wearing jeans) for "Brokeback Mountain," adapted from the Annie Proulx story.

McMurtry praises books. Yea books. Ossana tells us that "the duty of art is to send light into the darkness of men's hearts." Yea light.

11:12 p.m.

Uma Thurman is the presenter for Best Original Screenplay. I can't tell if her dress is cream, pink or peach. Darn lights. George Clooney is nominated again!!!!!! Sigh. He loses to the writers of "Crash." That was a good movie. Everyone go see it.

The writer/director, Paul Haggis (named after a disgusting Scottish breakfast food) says that "art is a hammer." I am learning so much about art tonight. The second winner doesn't get a chance to say ANYTHING. Why do they shove all the good awards to the end? THESE are the ones I want to hear speeches for.

11:19 p.m.

Tom Hanks and his "DaVinci Code" head of hair present the Best Director award. Will George win?????? Nah. It goes to Ang Lee for "Brokeback Mountain." He thanks people in Taiwan and the characters of Ennis and Jack.

11:22 p.m.

Jack Nicholson, in his sunglasses, presents the award for Best Picture. He kind of wanders off - literally - while reading the names of the nominees. Come on back., Jack. And the Oscar goes to........"Crash." Wow. An upset. But a good movie. Did I tell you all to go see it? You should. It makes you think, but in a good way.

The End. Good Night and Good Luck.

If you want to read more about the Oscars, check out my friend Maureen's blog. She drank a lot of coffee while writing her blog, so she has more detail than me. And of course E!Online is one of the best websites for dish, dirt and photos.

Omarosa is All Wet

2006-03-04T00:00:00.000-05:00

Very proud of the reporter on this story:)

Someone needs to keep Dick Cheney away from weapons

2006-02-12T20:48:00.000-05:00

So that he can't do any more harm! Bizarre news today that our Vice President was hunting over the weekend and accidentally shot his friend. Who is 78. They were hunting quail. How could DC confuse a man with a quail? It wasn't DAN Quayle.

The friend got shot and goes to the hospital. He is apparently okay. And this story stays under wraps for A WHOLE DAY. Because why should we, the American people, EVER need to know that our VP accidentally SHOOTS people?!? No, we don't need to know that!

Cheney needs to be kept AWAY from weapons. Of any kind. Weapons of mass destruction, shotguns, water guns. Whatever.

All I can imagine is the furor that would have been created if Al Gore had shot someone accidentally. Gore would have been impeached.

Here is a really BLUNT column about the whole thing. And the latest news is that the guy Cheney shot (who is 78) suffered a mild heart attack when some of the birdshot moved to his heart. Oh boy.

Snow

2006-02-12T00:23:00.000-05:00

It is snowing lots and lots here in RandomReality land. Predictions are for up to 12 inches of snow. Here on the East Coast, that is a HUGE news story.

Right now, it is nice and quiet outside my window as I type. No car traffic. No airplane traffic up above. Everything is quiet and muffled and peaceful.

Oh wait! We are having Thunder Snow! Yep. It is snowing and there was just a large crack of thunder. Wow.

I got sucked into the "pre-snow" mania and found myself at the Walgreen's drugstore this morning. It was crazy, CRAZY, I tell you! People were grabbing milk, bread and toilet paper as if they were about to go underground to a bunker for five years. But I can't mock too much, because I bought bread, milk and toilet paper, too. I just won't use them all at the same time. At least not simultaneously.

In other news, RandomReality celebrates her birthday this weekend. I will be 29. Again.

U2 won Five Grammys! Wheeee!

2006-02-09T13:22:00.000-05:00

Watched some of the Grammys last night, but not all, because I was ALSO watching "Lost" and "American Idol." Thank God for the DVR.

But U2 won five Grammys, beating out Kanye West and Mariah Carey!!! Here is some great coverage of the Grammys, especially the backstage blog of Joal Ryan of E!Online. Much more coverage on the official U2 website.

U2 on the Grammy Awards tonight!

2006-02-08T15:41:00.000-05:00

Whee! U2 is nominated for a couple of Grammy Awards. The show is tonight at 8 p.m. Bonnnnnnoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Robert Scorpio is back on "General Hospital!"

2006-02-03T11:14:00.000-05:00

Robert Scorpio (Tristan Rogers) is back in Port Charles. This is very exciting news! Almost as exciting as when Dr. Noah Drake (Rick Springfield) returned last month! In the 1980s, my teenage friends and I were HUGE fans of GH. That is what we called it - GH. That was in the heyday of Luke and Laura, Robert and Anna, Noah and Bobbi. Sigh.

When I was 14 years old and a freshman in high school, the wedding of Luke and Laura was THE most important thing in my life. The actors were on all the magazines and the wedding was covered with almost as much pomp as the nuptials of hapless Princess Diana to Prince Charles.

The other day, I was watching GH on the Soap Network, trying to follow some story line about Luke, on an island, with a monkey. (I started watching GH again in December when Noah returned, as an alcoholic, with a son, who needs a liver transplant. Noah, not the son.)

All of a sudden - there was Robert Scorpio! Now it turns out that the monkey is the carrier of some Dread Disease. Already, characters are being infected! The only one who might be able to stop the Dread Disease is Robert Scorpio! (Why am I writing in exclamation marks?!)

I tried to follow along yesterday as Robert had to explain to his daughter, Robin (the HIV-infected doctor) that he, Robert, had NOT died in a boat explosion. The explanation was soooooooo GH. See, no one saw the boat explode. And he wasn't really dead. He and Anna were agents for the WSB and Anna was going to be "black-boxed," which apparently, is a BAD thing. And the WSB blackmailed Robert, saying they would hurt Anna and Robin. So Robert became a covert agent and killed people for 11 years. And then he took a job with the Medical Rescue Association, where he is now on the trail of the Dread Disease, spread by the monkey.

Whew!

Bono Speaks At National Prayer Breakfast in D.C.

2006-02-02T16:12:00.000-05:00

Bono addressed politicians, including President Bush, in Washington, D.C. today at the National Prayer Breakfast. He urged the United States to contribute just one percent more to the world's poor. Go Bono!

No half-human/half-animal hybrids!

2006-02-01T16:14:00.000-05:00

W. got me all worked up last night during the State of the Union address! We must make sure these evils creatures never see the light of day! Here is a useful t-shirt!

George Clooney gets four Oscar nominations!

2006-01-31T09:43:00.000-05:00

RandomReality is blogging bright and early this morning because of wonderful news! My Fantasty Boyfriend, George Clooney, received FOUR Oscar nominations! HEE!

His movie "Good Night and Good Luck" is one of the Best Picture nominees. George got nominated as Best Supporting Actor for his role in "Syriana," (a good movie although I still don't exactly know what was happening in it); Best Director and Best Screenplay. SHRIEKK!

Right now, I am telling you all NOT to call me on March 5 during the Oscars unless you wish to hear incoherent burbling and squealing from me.

Now, if I only I can meet him in the next few weeks and convince him to take me to the Oscars as his date. Hmmm. How to do that. Must ponder.

Russell Crowe was shut out of the Best Actor category for "Cinderella Man," even though he was very, very good in the movie.

Here are the nominees for Best Picture: "Munich," "Capote," "Good Night and Good Luck," "Crash" and "Brokeback Mountain." I feel very hip and in-the-know because I saw them all.

My friend Karen saw "Brokeback Mountain" last night and this is how she sums up the cowboys' tormented love: "If they can't be together, at least their shirts can." (You gotta watch to the end of the movie to get that. Hee.)

My review of "Brokeback Mountain"

2006-01-22T14:54:00.000-05:00

At first, I vowed NOT to see "Brokeback Mountain," because I resented feeling obligated to do so. I like to discover movies on my own, thank you very much, instead of having Hollywood shove them down my throat. For instance, I didn't see "Schindler's List" until YEARS after it came out.
But this weekend, I caved. I felt I needed to see "Brokeback Mountain" since it is now part of the cultural zeitgeist. I am all about the cultural zeitgeist.
So here is what I thought:
There are a lot of sheep in this movie. LOTS of sheep. In fact, the sheep took up like the first 30 minutes. There is a lot of wrestling in this movie. Since the characters are so repressed, they tend to wrestle and smack one another as a form of foreplay. Later, there is punching in the mouth. So sheep, wrestling and punching take up a good chunk of the fist part of the movie.
Nice scenery. Good acting. Compelling story. But eh, I am not so sure it is THE best movie of the year. I saw "Munich," "Cinderella Man" and "Capote" and thought they were all better.
"Brokeback Mountain" breaks a lot of ground and all that. It is also quite depressing so don't go see it in a melancholy mood. It deserves the hype its getting, but again, I am not so sure it is THE best movie of the year.
The sheep would probably disagree.

Memorial for former Sen. Gene McCarthy

2006-01-19T14:08:00.000-05:00

A lot of you know that I am friends with my 85-year-old doppelganger named Catherine Foley Quigley. (Or maybe I am her doppelganger) She is also a writer and is the coolest senior citizen I know. Her ex-husband was the brother-in-law of former Sen. Gene McCarthy, the 1968 presidential candidate. Catherine was friends with McCarthy's wife, Abigail. Abigail died in 2000 and Gene McCarthy died a few weeks ago. The McCarthy's had separated in 1968 but never divorced.
Here is Catherine's report on the memorial service for McCarthy, a unique voice in American politics:
--
Last Saturday I attended the Memorial Service for Senator Eugene McCarthy at the National Cathedral on Wisconsin Avenue in DC. Although he was my ex-brother-in-law, his family always considered me as part of the family; and his oldest daughter Ellen, who planned the memorial, specifically invited me to the service.
It was simply a glorious occasion, and I am still recovering from it. My three sons and daughter-in-law flew down to honor their uncle, and with my daughter Eileen, our family was well represented.
Showers and 50 degrees had been predicted, but instead, an overcast sky held back the rain while we drove down to the cathedral. I wore my black and white checked pant suit with my small, red L.L. Bean cloche. Our instructions were to be in the Rare Book Room, to the right as you enter the cathedral, by 10 a.m. Anxious for a parking spot, we arrived at 9:30 and parked beyond the construction in front.
The family group quickly grew. What fun to meet Gene's children, two daughters and a son, and their children and cousins. I carried two cameras, my new digital and a "throw-away."
Suddenly, about 10:45 a.m., former President Bill Clinton materialized with his Secret Service detail fending off people who got too near him. Immediately, a rippling excitement flowed around the room while he, grinning, stopped to autograph the elegant programs. I told him that I had voted for him. (But I didn't mention how stupid I thought he had been by getting entangled with Monica you-know-who.) He grabbed my hand, leaned forward to within an inch of my left cheek, caught my eye, and exclaimed, "Thank you. THANK you.THANK YOU! I felt that he appreciated my vote that had elected him President of the United States. Of course, I was busy snapping my cameras; and most of my pictures turned out great.
At 11 am, the Leader signaled for our family group to proceed into the nave of the cathedral. My oldest son Tim escorted me. We paused momentarily, and I had a flashback to June 25, 1945 when I had been present at Abigail's and Gene's wedding at the Newman Center at the University of Minnesota. Then, I looked around at the 800 people gathered in the cathedral last Saturday, and I realized that I was the only person there who had also attended his wedding so many years ago. I felt this a special blessing.
During our slow walk down the aisle. I was stunned with the beautiful altar, the magnificence of the cathedral, the whole ambiance. I loved it! Actually, I was blown away. And I am just now recovering.
Six long rows of comfortable seats were reserved for the family in the right section upfront. Tim and I sat at the middle-aisle end of the fourth row.
One of Gene's nieces had married Peter Yarrow of Peter, Paul and Mary of our youth. Peter and his daughter performed several times during the service. The congregation joined them in several songs. So I sang with Peter Yarrow that morning.
The service lasted three minutes short of two hours, but it was so beautiful that I wanted it to go on and on and on. Several times I tried to think what kind of a comment Gene would make about this wonderful service.
Three Catholic prelates sat with the Bishop of Washington, an Episcopalian, and the service was non-denominational. Of course, President Clinton stole the show with his tribute to Gene. But the other speakers were excellent, too.
The music was superb. "Fanfare for the Common Man" by Copeland electrified me, and I tingled. After the service, we faced a chilling wind for about a block across cobblestones to the St. Albans gym for the reception. Many familiar politicians were schmoozing, reminiscing about the '68 campaign.
My sister Mary whispered to me," I think I'll join the Episcopalians. They know how to put on a great show!"
A former campaigner walked through the crowd handing out "McCarthy" buttons from that old campaign of thirty-eight years ago. A harpist performed background music of Irish songs and other favorites. I complimented her and added, to her amusement, that her "Barcarolle" by Hoffman was the first piece I had learned to play on the violin.
Bookmarks were handed out, and immediately became collectors' items. I recognized the familiar "McCarthy " above a dove with "Peace" solidly below, a Shah drawing used during the '68 campaign. Below this was Gene McCarthy's poem, "The Road from Emmaus."
The words are simple but reading them slowly I felt Gene had given us another gift with: "I walked alone from Emmaus; met a friendly company upon the road, heard soft voices, felt the warmth of love and passed on."
-- Catherine Foley Quigley

Wish RandomReality a Happy Second Anniversay

2006-01-15T22:00:00.000-05:00

My friend, Maureen, the intrepid reporter, spotted that this blog was created two years ago. Let me take this opportunity to thank you for reading RandomReality and to announce that gifts of chocolate are appropriate for this anniversary.

RandomReality fills out one of those silly surveys!!!

2006-01-10T01:20:00.000-05:00

Welcome to the 2006 edition of getting to know your friends. What you are supposed to do is copy (not forward) this entire e-mail and paste it onto a new e-mail that you'll send. Change all the answers so they apply to you, and then send this to a whole bunch of people including the person who sent it to you. The theory is that you will learn a lot of little things about your friends, if you did not know them already.

1. What time did you get up this morning? 10:30 A.M.
2. Diamonds or pearls? MUST I CHOOSE?
3. What was the last film you saw at the movies? 'MATADOR" VERY QUIRKY AND AMUSING
4. What is your favorite T.V. show? LOST
5. What do you usually have for breakfast? CEREAL WITH MILK AND OJ
6. What is your middle name? SARAH
7. Favorite cuisine? JAPANESE
8. What foods do you dislike? RAW FISH. KIM ORIOLE MADE ME EAT IT ONCE AND I AM STILL TRAUMATIZED
9. What is your favorite chip flavor? POPCORN RATHER THAN CHIPS
10. What is your favorite CD at the moment? U2'S "HOW TO DISMANTLE AN ATOMIC BOMB"
11. What kind of car do you drive? 1999 VW BEETLE
12. Favorite sandwich? WAWA SMOKED TURKEY AND PROVOLONE WITH PICKLES
13. What characteristic do you detest? RACISM
14. Favorite item of clothing? MY HOODIE FROM OLD NAVY
15. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where you go? IRELAND
16. What color is your bathroom? BORING BEIGE
17. Favorite brand of clothing? WHATEVER IS ON SALE
18. Where would you retire to? FLORIDA - EXCEPT DURING HURRICANE SEASON
19. What was your most memorable birthday? 21 WAS PRETTY MEMORABLE
20. Favorite sport to watch? NO SPORTS. ICK SPORTS
21. Farthest place you are sending this? ENGLAND
22. Who do you least expect to send this back to you? SUZANNE, CAUSE SHE JUST SENT IT TO ME
23. Person you expect to send it back first? CHRISTINA, BECAUSE SHE LIVES FOR THESE QUIZZES!!!
24. Goal you have for yourself? MEET GEORGE CLOONEY
25. When is your birthday? FEB. 18
26. When is your anniversary? HAVE NOT YET MET/MARRIED GEORGE CLOONEY
27. Are you a morning person or a night person? YOU HAVE TO ASK THIS?? NIGHT.
28. What is your shoe size? 6. ARE YOU BUYING ME SHOES?
29. Pets? DUST BUNNIES UNDER BED
30. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with us? JEFF CONAWAY IS REALLY REALLY WHACKED OUT ON "CELEBRITY FIT CLUB" AND I AM ENJOYING HIS MELT DOWN VERY MUCH
31. What did you want to be when you were little? A WRITER
32. What are you today? A WRITING TEACHER
33. What is your favorite candy? DARK CHOCOLATE
34. What is your favorite flower? ROSES
35. What is a date on the calendar you are looking forward to? ARBOR DAY, AS ALWAYS
36. If you could have one wish what would it be? SEE QUESTION #24

The Oscars

2006-01-05T23:12:00.000-05:00

Yippee! Jon Stewart is going to host the Academy Awards this year on March 5!

SNL rap video: "Chronicles of Narnia"

2006-01-03T01:25:00.000-05:00

This is a funny rap video made by two of the comedians on "Saturday Night Live." It is very retro-Beastie Boys, although the lyrics refer to cupcakes and Mapquest. Oh and Matthew Perry. Hee.

Happy New Year!!!

2005-12-31T14:28:00.000-05:00

RandomReality, its staff and management, wish you a Happy New Year!!!

Here are my wishes for 2006:

* Peace on earth (of course)

* My personal wish, which many of you know about

* Happiness and health to all my friends and family

* Katie Holmes comes to her senses

* Katie Holmes and Brooke Shields become best friends

* Britney Spears comes to her senses

* Britney Spears stops going into gas station bathrooms in her bare feet

* Brad Pitt starts wearing a vial of Angelina Jolie's blood around his neck as a symbol of his love for her

* Bono never stops campaigning for Africa and social justice because U2 fans do NOT find it dull

* Low fat cheese tastes better

* C2 cola overtakes Coke Zero in wild popularity so that I do not have to go on reconnaissance missions to find C2

* I meet George Clooney (of course)

* My students pick up and read an actual newspaper once in a while

And add your own below...

RandomReality on Vacation

2005-12-21T14:43:00.000-05:00

Happy holidays, faithful readers. It is time for RandomReality to take a holiday break. Entries will resume in early January.

SHRIEK! Bono named "Person of the Year" by Time Magazine!!

2005-12-18T22:04:00.000-05:00

Oh yeah and Bill and Melinda Gates, too. Hee!

In the cover photo, Bono is wearing the same glasses he had on when I met him (for 3 seconds) at the World Affairs Council reception.

What is that click? Am I being taped?

2005-12-16T23:11:00.000-05:00

Oh and by the way, your e-mails and phone calls may be monitored - without your knowledge and without warrants- by the U.S. government. Apparently we now live in China WITHOUT ANY RIGHTS AT ALL.

Have a nice day.

Leo from "The West Wing" died!

2005-12-16T23:02:00.000-05:00

This is very sad news! John Spencer, the actor who plays Leo on "The West Wing" died of a heart attack. I have not been watching the show much lately but when I do, I always enjoyed Spencer's character and acting.

"Syriana" and Golden Globes

2005-12-13T22:15:00.000-05:00

Went to see the movie "Syriana" the other night, which stars my Fantasy Boyfriend, George Clooney. Enjoyed it, although I really have no idea what it is about.

Oil is bad, the U.S. government can be dirty and it hurts to be tortured. That is pretty much what I picked up from the movie. Still, I enjoyed it, in a confused way.

In happy, exciting, fabulous news - Clooney's movie "Good Night and Good Luck" picked up FOUR Golden Globe nominations today!!!!!!!! This includes Best Drama, Best Screenplay and Best Director. You know where I will be on Jan. 16!!!!! Parked in front of the TV! Clooney also picked up a Best Supporting Actor nomination for "Syriana," which shows that even though no one knows what is going on in the movie, we can all figure out that Clooney is a good actor in it.

Nieman Narrative Conference

2005-12-07T18:59:00.000-05:00

Hi guys. The conference in Boston last weekend was really interesting. I took a lot of notes but have been too busy to blog them. To tide you over, click here.

Don't forget Rick Springfield will be back on GH!

2005-12-01T12:40:00.000-05:00

My eighth-grade Fantasy Boyfriend, Rick Springfield, will be back on "General Hospital" tomorrow for four shows! He will do brain surgery! However, his character, Dr. Noah Drake, is also a drunk! So that will be tricky. Remember to watch!

Here is some background from AOL News:

Mr. Springfield, who lives in Los Angeles, was receptive to the offer. "I got a call from my agent one day, saying, 'Would you be interested in recreating your role for four days on 'General Hospital?' " he said. "I'm busy enough that I don't need to go back to work there, but I enjoy acting, and it certainly would work within what I want to do with music."

He began shooting his episodes at the beginning of November. The plot: Dr. Drake, who left Port Charles to become a neurosurgeon in Atlanta, is urgently needed at General Hospital to operate on a patient with severe brain damage. Unfortunately, Dr. Drake is less sober than he once was. "Things haven't gone well for Noah," Mr. Springfield said with a laugh.

The four days have turned into a longer storyline. "I think we all need to see how it pans out," Mr. Springfield said. "No one's going, 'Where do I sign?' or 'We're done.' "

And how does it feel to be back? "It's freaky," he said.

Tom Wolfe

2005-11-30T00:07:00.000-05:00

I am going to a writer's conference in Boston this weekend and Tom Wolfe will be the keynote speaker. Anyone got any suggestions as to what I should ask him? Anyone dare me to spill juice on his white suit?

Why is this commercial jingle in my head?

2005-11-28T17:23:00.000-05:00

When it says Libby's, Libby's, Libby's

On the label, label, label

Movies I Am Excited to See

2005-11-23T16:12:00.000-05:00

These movies are on my "must-see" list for the next few weeks:

* Syriana

* Rent

* Pride and Prejudice

A great series of stories by my friend Antigone

2005-11-22T16:05:00.000-05:00

My friend Antigone Barton, quirky individualist and reporter extraordinaire, won 2nd place in the NABJ contest for a series of articles on the HIV/AIDS epidemic in Palm Beach County, Fl.

Read the series here.

U2 concert in NYC last night (Nov. 22)

2005-11-22T14:13:00.000-05:00

Took Amtrak to NYC last night to catch yet another U2 concert. After meeting Bono last month, I felt like I had to see the group perform one more time. So I bid for a ticket on Ebay, which was luckily sold by a nice U2 fan. However, the seat turned out to be pretty crappy. Oh well.

On the train ride up, I sat next to a college student who hunched in his seat and talked on his cell phone the whole way. He would like an XBox 360 for Christmas, as well as a digital camera. During the conversation, he tried to persuade the person on the other end that "what's two pages between friends?" Hmmm.

My friend Lisa met me at Neptune, a tasty Polish restaurant on 12th Street. We had pierogies and stuffed cabbage. Yum. Even better, I did not throw up, which is how I spent most of Sunday (from a stomach bug, alas, not from too much fun). Two waitresses took our order. I am not sure if both were new or our order (MANY pierogies) was too complicated.

Around 9 p.m., Lisa drove me to Madison Square Garden to see U2. SHRIEK!!!!! But it was gray and rainy and kind of icky and I felt kind of icky. Sigh. Found my seat, which was in the LAST row of the HIGHEST section, BEHIND the stage. Oh well. This way, I could look at Bono's butt. Although I found myself staring more at Adam's butt. You know, I don't stare enough at Adam and I should.

At first I was seated next to a giggly gay foreign man, who seemed to be hitting on his companion. The concert started. My view was partially blocked by the wall to my left, the ledge above me and the very tall people in front of me. Sigh. Then the pot smoking started. Hello. That went out in high school. Well, not MY high school, which was all girls, conservative and Catholic, but you know what I meant. So there I was, in a confined space, smelling bad pot. (I am not a pot aficionado, but this stuff didn't smell too good.)

Watched the concert. Look at Bono and Adam's butts. Got to see how Bono really can NOT dance and how he hops a lot. The group still had a lot of energy, considering they have been on tour for months. They played "I Will Follow," one of their earliest hits, which they don't perform too much.

Bono sang the song dedicated to his father, Bob, who died not too long ago. Every day for 10 years, Bono's father would greet him by saying: "Why don't you take off those stupid, fucking sunglasses?" So Bono did, in his dad's honor, while he sang "Sometimes You Can't Make it On Your Own."

He brought a little blond boy on stage during "Sunday Bloody Sunday" and chased Edge all the way around the oval on another couple songs. I hoped he wouldn't slip and hurl himself into the audience. Bono is not the most graceful of men.

Neither were the drunk, loud, rude girls who decided to switch seats and stand next to me. (The giggly gay man had disappeared. I know not where). "Bonooooo!!!!" they slurred, as they bumped into me and swayed. I couldn't take it anymore, cursed them off, jumped over the rail and found another seat. Next to some cute guys. And in fact, it was a BETTER seat.

The best part of the show, for me, was Bono singing "With or Without You" while hugging and dancing with a young woman from the crowd. Sigh. Someday that will be me. But remember, I love him but not in a CREEPY way.

George Clooney's new movie is out - "Syriana"

2005-11-22T14:08:00.000-05:00

My Fantasy Boyfriend, George Clooney, is starring in ANOTHER new movie. This is the one where he hurt his neck doing a stunt and injured his spinal cord, causing him to have blinding headaches!

He was at a premiere party in NYC the other night. Sadly, I was not there. But this article in the New York Times gives a lovely description, including how middle-aged women offer to leave their husbands for George and how sometimes he feels like a monkey.

Meanwhile, Kenny from New York, a friend of a friend, went to the Four Seasons hotel bar on Nov. 17. George was there! He stood about five feet away from Kenny. Of course, I demanded details of Kenny. Apparently, George was wearing a black shirt and sport coat (similar to what he wore on "Letterman" last night). He "stands out in a room," I am told. More importantly, if Kenny were gay, he said "I'd do him."

Follow the little rolling balls

2005-11-17T17:56:00.000-05:00

This is strangely addicting. It could make me mental.

Maryanna Senek-Brandt

2005-11-13T22:35:00.000-05:00

This entry is dedicated to Maryanna Senek-Brandt, otherwise known as Mara. We went to the same high school and college and she sang in the Villanova Women's Glee Club with me. Mara died on Thursday of cancer at the age of 39. I didn't know she was sick.

Mara was two years older than me and we kept in touch only sporadically over the years. She was one of those friends whom I always thought I would get in touch with when I had more time.

She was quirky and an individual. I admired that about her, when so many people at our high school and at Villanova just wanted to conform. She loved to write and even put me into one of her novels that she wrote in high school.

Mara had a son that she loved. She was an attorney, who worked for the state government because it was a steady job, but it was never who she really was.

Here is her obituary:

Maryanna E. Senek-Brandt, 39 of Shirley Lane, Boiling Springs, died Thursday, November 10, 2005 at the Harrisburg Hospital.

Born on December 13, 1965 in Philadelphia, PA, she was the daughter of the late Walter and Helen Pisieczko Senek.

She was a 1983 graduate of St. Basil Academy; 1987 graduate of Villanova University and 1990 graduate of Dickinson School of Law. She retired as deputy chief council of PA State Employee Retirement System. She was a member of the St. Patrick Catholic Church, Carlisle and also a member of the PA Bar Assoc; Villanova Glee Club. She loved writing short stories and was an avid reader. She also enjoyed singing and playing the piano.

Surviving are her husband of 15 years, Gary E. Brandt, Boiling Springs; son, Jake N. Brandt, Boiling Springs; step mother, Ann Senek, Jenkintown, PA; step brother Ronald Strykowski, Mt. Laurel, NJ; step sister, Elaine Shannon, Ardsley, PA; uncle and aunt, Joe and Ann Senek, Philadelphia, PA.

A Memorial Mass of Christian burial will be held 1:00 p.m. Tuesday November 15, 2005 in the St. Patrick Catholic Church, Marsh Drive, Carlisle with the Rev. William J. Waltersheid as celebrant. Burial will be at the convenience of the family. There will be no viewing or visitation.

Hoffman-Roth Funeral Home, 219 North Hanover St., Carlisle is in charge of the funeral arrangements.

In lieu of flowers memorial contributions may be made to the American Cancer Society, 3211 North Front St., Suite 100, Harrisburg, PA 17110.

I am a winner! Who knew there was a lottery in the Netherlands! Oh I am sooooo lucky!!! HAHAHAHAHA!

2005-11-09T18:22:00.000-05:00

GOOD NEWS FOR YOU !!!
CONGRATULATIONS YOU HAVE WON !!!

FROM THE PROMOTIONS MANAGER,
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RESOURCE CREDIT TRUST.

DAYZER LOTTERY INTERNATIONAL.

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Judith Miller retires from the NY Times

2005-11-09T16:23:00.000-05:00

You all know that I totally supported her cause over the summer - her opposition to the federal government compelling her to testify about her source, for an article she never even wrote. I wrote her in prison and everything.

But I also must say that I think it is time for her to be going from the New York Times.

Anderson Cooper eats the same food for dinner every night

2005-11-09T15:25:00.000-05:00

According to this article, he eats pesto pasta every night. It used to be a veggie burger, but he switched. He eats granola bars too and can apparently fall asleep anywhere, in any circumstance. I wish I had that gift.

Woman hides parrot in her bra

2005-11-08T14:38:00.000-05:00

All I gotta say is, that is SOME bra!

London paper says Clooney involved in alley spat

2005-11-04T19:32:00.000-05:00

This just in from faithful reader, Joe D. of Alaska. It is a link to a story from a London newspaper about how my Fantasy Boyfriend, George Clooney, was penned in by the paparazzi and felt that the security at a London nightclub may have been, um, inadequate. I think George was provoked!!!!!!

7:46 p.m.

Aha! George Clooney is emphatically DENYING that this story took place!!!

Anderson Cooper gets new job at CNN

2005-11-03T15:03:00.000-05:00

This article in the New York Times says that "America is Embracing Anderson Cooper." Um, I might like to, um, embrace Anderson Cooper.

I do feel bad for Aaron Brown, though. He is quite talented and has done a great job anchoring all the crises of the past few years.

This reporter interviewed George Clooney!

2005-11-02T18:46:00.000-05:00

SHRIEK! So jealous! Of course she did a nice job and he is as wonderfully articulate as ever. Sigh.

Bono in Time magazine

2005-11-01T20:47:00.000-05:00

Excellent column by Bono in this week's Time magazine about the need for aid to Africa.

Photo by Mike Hutchings/Reuters

Me. Bono and Backpack Lady

2005-10-22T20:02:00.000-04:00

PART 1

On a chilly fall night on Oct. 21, my world, that of Bono and a fan whom we shall refer to as Backpack Lady, all collided on the campus of the University of Pennsylvania.

In order to avoid burying the lead, I will state up front: Bono stood right in front of me. Close enough so that I could look at his adorable stubble on that pronounced chin. “I love you, but not in a creepy way,” I said. He put his right hand on my shoulder and squeezed as he chuckled. So we had our moment. Yippee! I waited 23 years for that! It was worth it.

But back to the beginning.

Bono was the guest speaker at the World Affairs Council of Philadelphia on Oct. 21 to discuss his non-profit, DATA, which is devoted to ending global poverty and the spread of AIDS, especially in Africa. He was also awarded with the International Statesman Award.

In the early1990s, I worked at WAC as a program assistant and Claudia was one of my bosses. On Friday, she got to accompany Bono throughout the evening. Even better, she got to introduce him.

“I’ve been following U2 for a long time, but I never thought I’d be opening for Bono,” Claudia quipped to the crowd.

The speech was at the impressive Irvine Auditorium on the campus of the Penn, where Bono was awarded a doctorate in law in 2004 during Commencement.

“Lawlessness, is more like it,” Bono said. His favorite part of the 2004 visit to Penn’s campus was draping a statue of Ben Franklin in leather.

“I though the Fly shades looked really good,” he joked.

There were about 1,200 people at the Irvine Auditorium, including 100 Penn students who won their tickets in a lottery. Tickets ranged from $75 to $495. While I did not attend the expensive dinner, let’s just say I dropped a chunk of change on this event But it is okay, since the money was going to DATA, which stands for Debt, AIDS, Trade, Africa.

I sat in the 15th row on the right hand side, with Bono at the podium on the right. My friend Phyllis, a fellow fan, sat in the balcony and we could wave back and forth. But not during Bono’s speech. Some things are sacred.

When Bono came out on stage, my first thought was: “Hey, he IS short.” And then I thought, “Hey! He is HOT.”

Bono was wearing black jeans, those clunky, four-inch thick leather shoes that are his favorites, a black jacket that looked designer, black shirt, rose-tinted shades and a silk mustard-colored tie that looked like he had tied it himself. It was rather askew. I don’t think he wears ties all that often and clearly his wife was not there to fix it for him.

He actually seemed a bit nervous at first, even with the standing ovation he received from the crowd.

“It’s not supposed to be a rock and roll show,” he told the crowd as he urged them to sit down.”

He apologized for being nervous.

“I’m not used to speaking to crowds of less than 20,000,” he said.

Bono joked that the speech would be “Bono unplugged, or worse, unstringed, or unhinged.”

“I’m hallucinating. Bruce Springsteen on stage again,” he said, making reference to the Boss’ appearance at the U2 concert on Oct. 17 at the Wachovia Center.

Bono shuffled a sheaf of papers and searched for some water on the podium. My heart stopped. When I worked at WAC, it was my job to put water on the podium. I know someone had put it there, but for a brief moment, I felt responsible and wanted to rush up with my bottle of water. But he found it. Whew.

Eighteen months ago, DATA launched the One Campaign to fight against “stupid poverty.”

Soon more than five million Americans will be members of Te One Campaign, “which makes us bigger than the NRA,” Bono said to applause.

“We don’t carry guns but we do mean business,” he said.

He referenced Live Aid in 1985 and Live 8 in 2005, both in Philadelphia. On July 2 of this year, we watched musicians like Jay-Z, Will Smith and Kanye West dance and sing on television. But what they were really doing, Bono said, was “pushing, cajoling, intimidating elected leaders.”

The purpose of Live 8 was to raise awareness of the July G-8 summit, held at a swanky golf course in Scotland. World leaders like George W. Bush, Tony Blair and Jacques Chirac met to discuss world trade. They were, Bono said. “the guys with the bling.”

But he chided the leaders for the choice of location for the summit.

“To discuss the world’s poor, let’s meet in a golf course in Scotland. Brilliant.”

Bono, who was quite soft-spoken during his remarks, praised the leaders for agreeing to write off a large portion of the debt of some of the world’s poorer nations. People who are HIV positive in many poor countries are now getting anti-retroviral drugs to combat the disease, he said. But it will take much more effort to help all the people in need.

He praised two divergent groups: ACT-Up and Sen. Rick Santorum. The two could not be farther apart in politics, viewpoint and approach. But if those two can work together, he said, so can we.

Bono told the crowd – a portion of which were business people – that the notion of a rock star “prattling on about politics” may seem off.

But songs have always been a protest medium, he said. Especially the blues, which he called a direct complaint line to God. Many musicians mean well, but are guilty of “youthful indiscretions,” Bono told the crowd to much laughter.

Growing up in Dublin in the 1970s, Bono listened to the Clash and other punk groups. To him, the music was “an alarm” and it woke him up. The music, he said, sounded like revolution.

(CONTINUED BELOW)

Me, Bono and Backpack Lady

2005-10-22T18:10:00.000-04:00

(PART 2)

In 1984, he took part in Band-Aid, the African relief effort started by fellow Irish musician, Bob Geldof. The Live Aid concerts of 1985 followed and Bono’s life was forever changed.

In the summer of 1985, Bono and his wife quietly took a trip to Ethiopia to visit the poor. The children gave him a nickname, “the girl with the beard,” because of his sparkly earrings.

"Ethiopia didn’t just blow my mind,” he said. “It opened my mind.”

On one of his last days there, a father tried to give his infant son to Bono. He asked him to take the baby to Ireland and raise him. If he stayed in Ethiopia, the father knew his son would die. Bono had to say no. It is a feeling he can’t ever forget. And in that moment, he became a rock star with a cause.

Today, children in Africa die of malaria, the AIDS epidemic is sweeping the country with more than six million people dying every day.

“This is not a cause,” he said. “This is an emergency.”

History will judge us, he told the crowd, by how we treat Africa. No where else in the world would such poverty and illness be allowed to exist. If we don’t value the lives if Africans, he said, why should they value ours?

“This is not about charity,” he said. “It is about justice.”

Providing aid to Africa is not only the moral thing to do, he said, it is the smart thing to do. Poverty breeds despair. Despair breeds violence. Violence leads to terrorism.

More than 40 percent of Africans are Muslim. A better world, is a safer world, he said. The United States is not the most popular country in the world right now, he said. But we can change that by becoming a leader in African relief.

Bono loves the States he told the crowd. He has read the Constitution. He has been to Independence Hall. But power brings responsibility.

In 1780, Benjamin Franklin went to Ireland for three months, he said.

“He went to Scotland too, but who cares,” Bono said to laughter.

Franklin was distressed at how the English oppressed the Irish. So instead of the government of Ireland inspiring the United States, it was the other way around. The Irish and Americans are very alike in their compassion and ability to give.

Despite the tsunami, terrorist attacks and Hurricane Katrina, we must give more – to Africa. Every generation has its struggle, he said. This is ours.

“We are being watched. By history and by God.”

His speech made me want to get involved, spread the word and be accountable. I am glad I went. I am glad WAC asked him to be a speaker. So cool.

After Bono was presented with the award, several hundred people in the crowd walked a few blocks to the University Museum for a cocktail reception. I was wearing black beaded shoes, a black dress with a floral print, eye shadow, curled hair and a whole lot of Beautiful perfume. I was ready.

Inside the museum, I got a beer (in an elegant wine glass) and sought out the hors d’oeuvres. Crab and briein phyllo dough. Yum!!! I had a few of those. Near me stood a woman, in her late 40s or 50s, with a backpack and clutching a sheaf of papers.

The waiter tried to offer her a crab snack.

“I am not here to eat!” she snapped at him.

Unable to control my curiosity and because I am a nosy journalist, I had to ask: “So why are you here?”

“To give Bono these papers” she said, clutching white paper in a blue binder.

“What is it? A subpoena?” I asked.

“No,” she said, looking at me as if I were crazy. Uh huh. “Someone has to be in charge. His management company knows about this!”

O-kayyyyyyy, I thought and moved away. I later found out that this particular fan has a Bono altar, to which she prays, and thinks that Bono’s managers are evil and she must get him away from them. I have no idea what the papers said but I don’t believe she ever gave them to him. I also don’t know what the heck was in that backpack.

More hors d’oeuvres, but this time weird eggplant on lettuce leaves. Bleh.

I talked with Marie, a recent graduate of Temple University, who works as a cancer researcher and wants to be a doctor. We both wanted to get more beverages but were afraid to move in case Bono came out and we missed him.

About fifteen minutes later, the waiter came out with chicken-on-a-stick! Yes! I scarfed up some and was busy gnawing away when I noticed that Bono had come out all the way on my left. Shoot! There were a lot of people between me and him.

The guards made a human barricade and forced us all behind their arms. I took my chicken with me and stood right behind the guard. I think his arm was on my chest, but not on purpose.

I realized that Bono, led by Claudia and flanked by his bodyguard, was working his way down the line. And I was in the front! For once in my life, I was in the right spot!!!

He got closer. And closer. Grown men and women all around me started going a little nuts. There was shoving! Hey people, this is not a mosh pit!

Claudia was saying sternly, “No autographs! No autographs!” But some people still shoved paper at Bono and he still signed some.

He got closer. Wow. It was weird to see someone I have watched so many times since 1983, but this time he was RIGHT NEAR ME.

His stubble looked adorable. His chin is pronounced. His hair is thick and lovely. I wish I could see his eyes through his shades. I LOVE HIM!!!!!

He got very close. The couple behind me shoved a photo at him and shouted something about their wedding or his wedding and the “Unforgettable Fire” album. I have no idea. He snatched the picture and looked at it.

“You can keep it,” they said. Uh, okay.

He is in front of me. RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. Time stood still. I looked at him. He was grabbing hands and pieces of paper. I must say something. I must seize the moment. This is what came out of my mouth:

“I love you, but not in a creepy way,” I said.

He looked back at me, put his right hand on my right shoulder and squeezed it while he held it there for a moment. He chuckled as he walked on. I HAD MADE BONO LAUGH!!!!!!!!!!!! On my right, a couple shoved a copy of the “War” album at Bono for his signature. “No autographs!” Claudia scolded.

Off to my right, I saw Backpack Woman with her glasses glinting in the light. Luckily, she looked a little bit further in the back. Bono walked on and then into the fancy dinner. And that was it.

Sigh. I will never wash my shoulder again. But I will work to end poverty and AIDS in Africa. And so should youJ

There was a lot of press there to cover the event including NBC-10 and The Philadelphia Inquirer.

Rick Springfield coming back to "General Hospital!"

2005-10-22T18:05:00.000-04:00

Oh my, oh my! Dr. Noah Drake, a.k.a. '80s heart-throb Rick Springfield, is returning to Port Charles on Dec. 2 to begin four appearances on "General Hospital."

How I loved him in the early 1980s. Anne, Karen, Patty and I would rush home from school to watch "General Hospital." Those were the good days - of Luke and Laura and Rick and Monica (and Alan).

U2 in Philadelphia. Oct. 16

2005-10-17T17:11:00.000-04:00

In the middle of last night's concert, somewhere around "One" or maybe "With or Without You," I realized that I was completely and totally happen. You can't ask for more than that from a U2 concert. Thanks again to Jenny for getting me the ticket:)

To begin with, BONO IS HOT! I know that I always knew that, but Whoa Nelly! I realized it during "With or Without You," which was one of the many, many encores. Bono brought a young woman up onstage and held her close the whole song. She clung to him while he had one arm around her and the other arm on his mike. At the end, he knelt down and kissed her hand. Oh my.....

They did THREE encores. In fact, I thought the show was over and then they CAME BACK. They played "Yahweh," and led into "40." Sob. It was so perfect. You know, it is fitting that Larry is the last U2 member left on stage at the very end, because he created the band.

Bono dedicated "Stuck in a Moment" to Michael Hutchence and said he always thinks about Michael this time of the year.

"I don't know what Michael would have thought of the reality TV show," Bono said. "He might have liked it."

The concert began with "City of Blinding Lights" with Bono giving shout-outs to Philadelphia. He mentioned how the city sponsored two Live Aid/8 concerts and how the city's DJs were among the first to play U2 on the radio. When the band first played Philadelphia, it was to a crowd of 50. The next show was for 500. Then 5,000 and then 50,000.

U2 played "Electric Co." and "The Ocean" from their first album. I must say, I had absolutely no memory of "The Ocean." But it was nice to hear.

During one of the songs (maybe "Love and Peace") Bono brought a little boy named Owen on stage. The boy held Bono's hand and walked him around the ellipse.

"Thank you for walking me home, Owen," Bono told him at the end of the song.

Bono took off his sunglasses for the song about his Dad. God, Bono looks hot when he is sincere. He put on a cowboy hat for a new song, "Fast Cars." There was a guy in a cowboy hat a few rows in front of me who was waving his own hat around. Perhaps he thought Bono could see him.

Incidentally, sitting next to me were a dad and his sullen-looking early teens son. The son sulked through the whole show. The dad kept looking at him like, "HELLLLO. This is a U2 concert! It IS cool." But of course the teen did NOT think it was cool, precisely because his dad did. Sigh.

"Good Night and Good Luck" by George Clooney

2005-10-10T13:34:00.000-04:00

I can't wait to see this movie, by my Fantasy Boyfriend, George Clooney. It is all about Edward R. Murrow's news broadcast about Sen. Joe McCarthy. Here is the official website. It is playing in NYC right now and will come to Philadelphia on Oct. 14.

A sure sign of the apocalypse

2005-10-05T18:44:00.000-04:00

Katie Holmes is pregnant with Tom Cruise's baby.

Discussion topics: Did they actually have sex in order to get pregnant? What if she gets post-partum depression? Does this mean it is not a publicity stunt and that their love is true, real and tangible?

Nah, probably not. But I hope the poor girl doesn't get PPD because all she will get is a fistful of vitamins and a treadmill.

My head may explode from the excitement!

2005-10-05T12:32:00.000-04:00

George Clooney will be on the "Tonight Show with Jay Leno" on Thursday night. Followed by U2 on "Late Show with Conan O'Brien!!!!"

HAPPY! SHRIEK! CAN NOT BREATHE! NOW CAN BREATHE! SHRIEK!

A lovely interview with my pretend boyfriend, George Clooney

2005-10-02T22:08:00.000-04:00

Here is an excerpt from the article in The Washington Post:

"In person, Clooney, who is 44, is a surprisingly unextraordinary presence. He's handsome, certainly, with that nicely graying head of hair and a smile so devilish that you almost expect a glint of sunlight to bounce off his teeth. There's an attractive energy about him, too; he talks and moves about quickly. But movie cameras and magazine covers do funny things to people. In Clooney's case, they bulk him up and make him seem taller and sturdier than he is in person. His head, slightly large for his frame, settles into proportion on camera. In person, he's thinner than you'd expect, almost delicately boned (he gained 35 pounds for a recent part, but dropped all of it by "working out and not eating")."

I like all of that except for the weird comment about his large head. What?

"In Her Shoes"

2005-10-01T11:43:00.000-04:00

I saw a sneak preview of the new movie "In Her Shoes," starring Cameron Diaz, Toni Collette and the wonderful Shirley Maclaine. It is the story of two sister from Philadelphia and their grandmother in South Florida. Go see it! I urge you. The actress playing the elderly and snarky Mrs. Lefkowitz deserves an Oscar.

You all know that I am a big fan of Jennifer Weiner's novels. Weiner is a former Philadelphia Inquirer author who switched to creative writing with her first novel, "Good In Bed."

"In Her Shoes" is her second novel and the first to be made into a movie. Yes, it is a chick flick but guys will like it, too. Plus, Cameron Diaz spends part of the movie either in her underpants or a bikini. So that is a plus for the guys.

Bring tissues. I cried through a bunch of the movie. But in a good way. It is not like anyone dies.Even Mrs. Lefkowitz, who looks pretty darn old.

The movie was shot in Philadelphia and the city looks great. Another section of the movie was shot in a retirement community in South Florida and from my years of living down there, it is spot on.

In case you wish to buy me a gift...

2005-09-28T12:51:00.000-04:00

...any of these items would be lovely.

A lovely article about my OTHER boyfriend

2005-09-22T17:46:00.000-04:00

Bono.

George Clooney on "Letterman"

2005-09-19T16:48:00.000-04:00

My beloved, George Clooney, will be on with David Letterman on Wednesday, Sept. 21 on CBS at 11:30 p.m. So don't call me during that time!!!!!!!

George Clooney donates $1 million to Katrina relief

2005-09-06T16:11:00.000-04:00

http://www.prnewswire.com/cgi-bin/stories.pl?ACCT=104&STORY=/www/story/09-05-2005/0004100227&EDATE=

Little House on the Prairie

2005-09-06T00:30:00.000-04:00

TV Land has been running marathons of "Little House on the Prairie" at night. I have been watching and find that watching the doings of Ma, Pa and Half-Pint to be especially soothing in this mixed-up world and a great antidote for Apocalypse TV.

Read this column.

2005-09-04T13:43:00.000-04:00

One of the best I've read from reporters on the scene in New Orleans.

http://www.philly.com/mld/philly/news/12558216.htm

Reporters vs. politicians: Getting at the truth

2005-09-03T00:02:00.000-04:00

I am watching "Nightline" right now and am SO ANGRY at the bungled rescue efforts in New Orleans. Yea, I know there is massive damage to highways and transportation. But if we could airdrop water to the tsunami areas, why did it take us so damn long to do it in New Orleans. Old people and babies are dying. This is wrong. This is not supposed to happen in America.

On the other hand, I am SO PROUD of many of the reporters covering the story. They are talking to the people WHO MATTER - the people waiting to be rescued - and reporters are becoming rightlfully indignant at the appalling conditions. Even better, the reporters are hammering hard at the politicians. Who is in charge, the reporters ask? Why is help taking so long? When will these people be evacuated? How did things get this bad? All good questions.

I didn't even mind when Geraldo Rivera held up a baby and weeped. If his outrage and weeping gets some help to those folks in the Convention Center, then all the better. We have all this freakin' 24/7 coverage. Let's use it.

Click on the link below for a good example of tough journalism in which CNN analyzed what politicians were saying vs. what was REALLY happening at the scene. An excerpt follows:

http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/09/02/katrina.response/index.html

NEW ORLEANS, Louisiana (CNN) -- Diverging views of a crumbling New Orleans emerged Thursday, with statements by some federal officials in contradiction with grittier, more desperate views from the streets. By late Friday response to those stranded in the city was more visible.

But the conflicting views on Thursday came within hours, sometimes minutes of each of each other, as reflected in CNN's transcripts. The speakers include Michael Brown, chief of the Federal Emergency Management Agency, Homeland Security Director Michael Chertoff, New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin, evacuee Raymond Cooper, CNN correspondents and others. Here's what they had to say:

Conditions in the Convention Center

FEMA chief Brown: We learned about that (Thursday), so I have directed that we have all available resources to get that convention center to make sure that they have the food and water and medical care that they need. (See video of Brown explaining how news reports alerted FEMA to convention center chaos. -- 2:11)

Mayor Nagin: The convention center is unsanitary and unsafe, and we are running out of supplies for the 15,000 to 20,000 people. (Hear Nagin's angry demand for soldiers. 1:04)

CNN Producer Kim Segal: It was chaos. There was nobody there, nobody in charge. And there was nobody giving even water. The children, you should see them, they're all just in tears. There are sick people. We saw... people who are dying in front of you.

Evacuee Raymond Cooper: Sir, you've got about 3,000 people here in this -- in the Convention Center right now. They're hungry. Don't have any food. We were told two-and-a-half days ago to make our way to the Superdome or the Convention Center by our mayor. And which when we got here, was no one to tell us what to do, no one to direct us, no authority figure.

Let's blame the French

2005-09-01T18:07:00.000-04:00

I feel so helpless, awful and angry about the tragedy in New Orleans. But who do we blame? Mother Nature?

No. The French! We can blame the French!

First of all, it is fun to blame the French. Secondly, it was a stupid French guy who decided to build New Orleans in a below sea-level bowl, surrounded by water.

So you see, it is the fault of the French.

Amen to this NY Times editorial

2005-09-01T16:08:00.000-04:00

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/09/01/opinion/01thu1.html

Here are some excerpts:

"George W. Bush gave one of the worst speeches of his life yesterday, especially given the level of national distress and the need for words of consolation and wisdom. In what seems to be a ritual in this administration, the president appeared a day later than he was needed. He then read an address of a quality more appropriate for an Arbor Day celebration: a long laundry list of pounds of ice, generators and blankets delivered to the stricken Gulf Coast. He advised the public that anybody who wanted to help should send cash, grinned, and promised that everything would work out in the end."

(And here comes the kicker)

"It would be some comfort to think that, as Mr. Bush cheerily announced, America "will be a stronger place" for enduring this crisis. Complacency will no longer suffice, especially if experts are right in warning that global warming may increase the intensity of future hurricanes. But since this administration won't acknowledge that global warming exists, the chances of leadership seem minimal."

Read this blog

2005-09-01T15:50:00.000-04:00

http://martinirepublic.com/